What’s Real?

I spend a lot of time helping people think about what’s real. I don’t mean that all the people I see are delusional and ungrounded. In the age of the internet we are inundated with news, events, and a lifetime of experiences that can lead our thinking to be inaccurate and unhelpful and we can easily lose sight of what’s real and accurate.

So it’s important to spend a few moments thinking about what’s real.

Before we hit that share button on Facebook.

Before we accept the media’s account of events and current affairs.

And most importantly, before we accept our own negative self talk.

As we’ve seen over and over again, Facebook and the internet in general, perpetuates falsehoods and outright lies, often for years after a story has been debunked. The nature of the internet and media allows us too easily to see and hear only the stories and opinions that support and reinforce our own personal point of view. This can lead us to a very biased view of the world that is blissfully unaware and/or unsympathetic of alternative ways of understanding. It also feeds the anxiety and unsettled feelings so many of us carry; feelings that affect our attitudes and often, our health.

But it’s our own internal dialogue that can be the most harmful. That inner voice telling us we’re not good enough, smart enough, etc. We come to a point fairly early in life where we passively accept that voice despite any evidence demonstrating that we are good, we are smart, and we have good things to offer the world.

Maybe it’s time to try turning off the computer, the news feeds, the inner voice. The first two are easier—simply unplug the electronics. Talk with friends, engage in interesting activities, connect with nature. These actions will also help tame the inner voice. Mindfulness meditation also helps calm the inner voice by raising our awareness, which is a first step in learning to change that dialogue.

Begin by asking yourself, is it real?